Introducing the master of the Dork Side of the Force… Pwn Lord Jade!

Me: *bowing* Thank you! Thank you very much! Joining me today is the one, the only, Kell Warrior!

Kell Warrior: I’m going to kill that Suethor for misspelling ‘Kull Warrior’.

Me: Later. We’re ranting now. At least you have a name now. I thought I might have to call you Bob.

“Talk of slavery often brings forth images of Africans being shipped to colonies in the Americas during the nineteenth century. Few people realise that it is a problem in both rich and poor countries. In 2004, a United Nations report stated that slavery was the world’s largest source of criminal income after drugs and the illegal weapons trade. Furthermore, the growth in slavery has been so rapid that it could become the biggest earner within twenty years.

Modern slavery takes many forms. The common feature is the poor people, usually children or young adults, are kidnapped or tricked into travelling to a wealthier part of the world, where they are held captive and forced to work against their will.

In poor countries, it has long been common for youngsters to be captured and taken far away to work in sweatshops, to fight as soldiers, or to work in the sex industry. Some poor parents willingly sign their children over to people who promise to offer them a better life in another part of the world, while others hand their children over to crime syndicates and are too terrified to ever contact the police. Most disturbingly, many child slaves are street children or orphans who are sold into slavery by the police officers and care workers who are paid to protect them.

In rich countries, such as the UK and the United States, the vast majority of slaves are teenage girls who are forced to work within the sex industry. Girls as young as twelve are smuggled into the UK, beaten, terrorised and often injected with heroin or other narcotic drugs to make them docile, before being forced to have sex for money.

The problem is vast. It is estimated that there are more than twenty-five thousand forced sex workers in the UK (five hundred thousand within the European Union) and that over ninety percent of these are girls under the age of twenty. A few of these girls have been smuggled from Asia and Africa, but the majority are from Russia and the poorer parts of Eastern Europe.”

The above excerpt comes from the latest CHERUB book, The Fall, which I just finished. I know I was supposed to do honour killings, but I lost the web address, so I’ll do it later. A lot of this post comes from The Fall as it has a lot of information that I never heard about before.

I have known about the human trafficking operation for a long time, but I had no idea it was such a big problem. I always thought that most prostitutes had sex because they made loads of money and needed it badly. I didn’t realise so many were forced into it. But sadly, a lot of them are. It’s starting to get more publicity these days, but people still don’t care much about the women. I mean, you open up your Sunday newspaper and hear that some footballer slept with a prostitute and a lot of men just laugh and say ‘good on you, son’ (1). Anyway, they don’t realise that many of these women are being drugged and terrorised into it.

Another major problem is that some of these girls have been trafficked before. Once a girl is captured, the criminal gangs who traffic the girls regard them as their property. Girls caught by the British authorities are usually deported straight back to Russia (or wherever they come from, but I’ll just say Russia). With no home and no job, the gangsters frequently pick up the girls on the streets again and send them straight back to Britain.

‘Doesn’t the government do anything to stop that happening?’ I hear you ask. No, is the answer. It’s all to do with politics. A large proportion of the general public doesn’t like immigration (me included). The government is more popular if it’s tough on immigration (2) and any system the government puts in place to support these girls will be open to abuse. If they start giving special treatment to women who are forced into prostitution, then thousands of other illegal immigrants will start claiming that they were forced into prostitution. But how can they send those girls home with no protection from the gangsters? It’s just one of those horrible situations where there aren’t any easy answers.

That’s the governments excuse anyway. There are ways to see if someone’s telling the truth. Even if these girls are drugged before they are raped, a rapist always leaves DNA evidence, even if he uses a condom. So the easy way is for the woman to be checked for rape. If they have been, let them stay and give them help. If they haven’t, they’re obviously lying (unless the cops found them with the traffickers or in a circumstance like that) and then they can kick them back to their own country (3).

One of the major problems is the sentencing of the traffickers. The maximum sentence (according to what I’ve found out) is twenty years. On average, a group of traffickers can send over two hundred girls to suffer like this within that time. Surely that deserves life in jail?

But then again, when has the government or law ever shown common sense?

This subject may be revisited another time.

Human trafficking:

Stupidity factor (of the traffickers): 9/10

Stupidity factor (of the government): 8/10

Pwnage factor (of the traffickers): 8/10

Pwnage factor (of the government): 7/10

Kell Warrior: Well, wasn’t that fun?

Me: Not really. The part that angers me most are the government people who send these girls back to the country they came from. If I was one of them, I’d only pretend that I did and I’d adopt them or something.

Marek: *enters room with Cassie* What’s going on here?

Kell: Closing a rant.

Cassie: What? But why didn’t you invite me?

Me: You and Marek do the sporkings. Me and Kell do the rants. Don’t worry. You’ll get crossovers occasionally.

(1): I say ‘get a girlfriend’ but I’ll leave that for another time *grin*.

(2): Labour? Popular? That’s a laugh.

(3): But with Labour in charge, they’ll just lose the immigrants and it won’t matter what we do.

To read Cassie and Marek’s first sporking, go here: http://community.livejournal.com/deleterius/2669479.html

Now roll the end credits! *list of names goes by so quickly that you can’t see any of them*

Well, the Supersoldier is back. And today, his Pwnage Gun is targeted on... err... *whispers* What did you say you were going to pwn today?

Supersoldier: I serve Anubis.

*angry* Stop saying that! You don't serve him anymore. I bought you for five quid. Remember?

Supersoldier: *sighs* Fine. Today's pwnage is directed at sexism.

Sexism: "Prejudice or discrimination based on gender. Like other "isms," sexism can be personal, as when someone tells a joke or makes a remark that demeans a woman because of his or her gender, or institutional, as when women are paid less than men doing the same work."

Well, to list all the reasons this is incredibly dumb would take all day. We only have a ten minute slot, so we better make this quick. For a start, how did women become less than men in the first place? If you go by the Bible, it's because Eve gave Adam the apple. But the thing is, Eve was tricked by the snake. There's one flaw in this sexism. Who's to say that Adam wouldn't have fallen for the same trickery? Hell, if I remember correctly, Adam took it willingly. So this theory is canceled under the charge of terminal stupidity. I'll leave the mass incest for another time.

So, the historical version. Men were there to go and fight wars and women were there to keep the house clean, cook the man food and to bear children. *frowns* The flaw here should be obvious. Women are there to bear children. Exactly. And if all the women were dead? There would be no more men to fight all your little wars. And, no, we do not exist in a fanfiction. Male pregnancy is impossible except in freak accidents in the mothers womb. On this subject, if anything it should be the men who are discriminated against! And yes, I am a male. I raise this point because it's the men who start wars and cause most of the trouble. Name one occasion where a woman has started a war. And don't get smart with me and start talking about the Amazonians. But anyway, this point has been destroyed.

Now, on to modern day sexism. So... where to begin? Lets start with women getting paid less than men for exactly the same job. The average woman has been scientifically proven to be better than the average man at learning. So this would imply that women would be better at certain jobs as well. So why not have a female lawyer at the same pay as a male lawyer? Why not have women as generals in the army as they would be better tacticians? Although I do understand that they haven't been in the army as long, so none could have climbed to that rank yet. But why weren't they allowed in the army in the first place?

Although by far the dumbest sexism to ever exist is about that. Sex. If a man sleeps with who he wants, he's a 'man's man' (or something) or it's 'boys will be boys'. But if a woman sleeps with who she wants, she's automatically a 'slut'. I mean, where's the smegging logic in that? Why can't a woman sleep with who she wants to? Or maybe the question should be the other way around. Why can a man sleep with who he wants to? But, personally, I find one thing even dumber about this facet of sexism. It's not usually the men who start calling the woman a slut. It's usually the women. That's the strangest part of sexism to me. Why aren't women sticking up for each other in the face of overwhelming male stupidity?

Why should women be punished for wanting and/or liking sex while men do whatever they please? I asked a member of the PPC this question. I got this in response. "Because in our society, girls are taught to keep their legs together! Female sexuality is dirty and shameful. It's not precisely an outspoken public sentiment anymore (not politically correct!) but the undercurrents are strong. You have to keep the women in line, and you do it by making them ashamed of their bodies and their natural urges. Men are the sexual creatures, and women are moral, upright, and put up with sex out of their generous nature." Oh, and in case you couldn't tell, that was a highly sarcastic comment.

Now, if you ask me, that would be the origin of rape fantasies. Rape isn't the woman's choice, so it takes away the guilt of wanting and/or liking sex. Of course, you'll get the odd one or two who would actually like being dominated in that way, but I'll leave that topic alone. Mainly because it would be a bit too high for my personal rating of PG-13 (as the Americans call it), but also because I don't understand much of it, so can't pwn it. I had a bit more on this topic, but I've forgotten it.

Now, on to the next facet of sexism. Thanks to Amy Estevez for the helpful suggestion. Now, the usual consequences of unprotected and underage sex: the girl is left to deal with it on her own, the boy is not to blame at all and the girls family and friends shun her. Well... that was a fun waste of my typing time. Why do the girls family shun her, you ask? I could ask the same thing, as I have no clue.

Why is the boy free of any consequences? It's his fault. He's the one who uses the condom. It's his child, made from half of his DNA. So why is the girl to blame and he isn't? The boy should be more to blame. It's not like the girl wanted it. Pregnancy is bad enough for an adult, let alone an underaged person. Let's not even go into the birth itself. Pregnancy is the equivalent of carrying a bowling ball around, pushing up your ribs and sitting on your bladder for months on end. Add that to the fact that whenever you eat something, you have to sit a foot and a half away from the table and pregnancy is horrible. So explain again how it's the girl's fault. And to the first part, why should the girl have to deal with that on her own for nine months. Oh, yes. Because she's a 'slut'. *snort*

Now to pwn a little known part of sexism. I don't think many people even notice this (I didn't). Direct your thanks to Amy again. This occurs when toddlers are just that. Toddlers. When girls and boys are tiny little things, their natural instinct is to play with each other, but then the parents and teachers and politically correct losers arrive. The parents and teachers probably don't even realise what they're doing, while the PC brigade ruin everything (I'll rant on that another time). The parents will separate the two genders into groups. The girls are taught to play with dolls and plastic kitchens etc. Anything that would one day help in the home. Boys are taught to play with cars or play sports.

If a girl wants to play sports instead of mix-and-matching the outfits of a thousand different Barbies, they are apparently a 'tomboy'. If a boy wants to play with dolls, then his sexuality is in question. Then why is Action Man fighting Doctor X and Doctor Cliché once more. Because, guess what? They aren't dolls. They're action figures! ZOMG! Yet another way to discriminate against girls, because if they want to play with action figures, they're a tomboy! This is the same with even simple things like colours! Pink and purple are for girls and blue and red are for boys. *snorts* If someone likes a particular colour, they like a particular colour. Hell, I like purple. Doesn't make me gay. Although I've theorised that I might only like it because I tend to be a rebel and point out flaws in the world, so this might be a side-effect. Amy likes blue. Doesn't make her a tomboy.

Overall, anyone who is sexist should be sent to the nearest asylum with a stamp on their forehead saying 'Pathological idiot'.

Sexism:

Stupidity factor: 9/10
Pwnage factor 10/10

Wow. This is one of my best ever rants. Soon I'll make an addition to this detailing 'honour killings'.

Supersoldier: Can I 'honour kill' the 'honour killers' for their misguided ways?

No. Not till you're off duty anyway. You have more rants to compose!

See that icon? That's the icon I use for ultimate pwnage. Stargate fans will know why. *snort*

Anyway, today my pwnage gun is directed towards the 'almost raped' brigade. I know that, sadly, a lot of women aren't faking it when they say they've been almost raped, but there are a disturbing amount of women who do.

For those of you who have no clue what I'm saying, here's some edited quotes (to keep everything under a PG rating) from Encyclopedia Dramatica (a website which has provided me with many laughs, but even more need for brain bleach. I also find some articles offensive, but not many):

"What counts as almost raped?

This post is to say sorry. I have failed you. CoPM is not my full focus at the moment. I just found the Stargate SG-1 Season 9 boxset. *squee*

I will give you assurance that CoPM will take priority (anyone catch the bad Stargate pun in that sentence?) after I finish Season 9.

And to prove that I am actually writing CoPM, here's an extract (be warned, this is an alternate reality and in the future... yeah... it's important to the plot though):

Sophie woke up to the sound of the alarm clock. She slowly rolled out of the bed and looked at the calendar. Her breath hitched for a moment. Suddenly, in a burst of uncontrollable fury and anguish, she grabbed the alarm clock, ripped it out of its socket and flung it against the wall where it smashed into a dozen pieces. The other occupants of the house didn’t even flinch. They were used to it. Sophie looked at the fragments of the alarm before she fell to her knees and started sobbing.
This happened every year. Today was January the fourth. Tomorrow would have been the twenty-fifth wedding anniversary between her and George. Today was the twenty-fifth anniversary of his death.

XXXXX

Sophie was eighteen and she was six months out of Hogwarts. She was standing on the porch of Potter Manor staring at the sunset. She heard footsteps behind her and turned to see Remus. “I’m worried about him,” she said quietly. “He was supposed to be back three hours ago.”
“I know,” Remus replied. “I came out here to ask if you wanted the Order to search for him.”
“Please,” Sophie whispered. Remus nodded and walked back inside. Sophie turned back to watch the setting sun.
After a few hours, Sophie walked back to the house after spending some time watching the stars appear, something which always relaxed her. Not tonight though. She felt as if something was very wrong. Just as Sophie walked into the living room, the fireplace roared green and Remus stepped out of the Floo. Sophie gave him a questioning look.
“I’m sorry,” was all he said.
“Couldn’t you find him?”
“No, Sophie. We found him.”
Sophie’s eyes widened. “Then is he hurt? How bad is it?”
“Sophie…” Remus hesitated, knowing how badly this news would hurt her. “Sophie… George… he’s gone.”
“That’s not funny,” Sophie snapped. “Especially with the wedding tomorrow.”
“I wouldn’t joke about this, Sophie. We found his bo –”
“Don’t say that!” Sophie shouted. “I won’t believe you. I can’t believe you.” Sophie paused. “Where is he?”
“Sophie,” Remus began slowly, “I understand how hard this is for you to accept. I went through the same thing when Tonks died.”
“HE’S NOT DEAD!” Sophie screamed. 

XXXXX 

Upstairs, a four year old girl snuck out of her room to investigate the yelling which had woken her up. She jumped as a hand landed on her shoulder, just barely holding in a yelp.
Ten year old Cassie shook her head as the girl turned to face her. “I knew you’d try to sneak out. You really are too inquisitive,” Cassie said, trying a pathetic attempt to lighten the mood. “Leave her alone, Dawn.”
“But Mummy needs me!” Dawn protested, though making sure to keep quiet.
“No,” Cassie whispered, hugging her niece and letting some tears fall. “No-one can help Sophie at the moment.”

XXXXX

“Where is he?” Sophie whispered dangerously, taking out her wand and pointing it at Remus. “Last chance.”
“Alright,” Remus said quietly, resigned. “He’s in the orchard outside of the Burrow. When you see him, you’ll understand why I tried to stop you.”
“He’s not dead,” Sophie said with a scowl before Apparating away. She appeared just outside of the back door of the Burrow.
Molly jumped at the sound and Sophie grabbed her hand to stop Molly aiming the wand at her. Molly had tears in her eyes. “I can’t believe it. I went to the Ministry to talk to Arthur… and I came home to this.” Sophie saw that there was a Dark Mark in the sky, illuminating the orchard. “I’m so sorry, Sophie. He was a brilliant son, a good man and a great father and the wedding was –”
“He’s not dead!” Sophie interrupted, before setting off in a run towards the orchard. Molly fell to her knees and started crying again.
Sophie dodged the apple trees that grew around the orchard, sprinting to where she saw a group of people standing in a circle, facing inwards. Moody heard her footsteps and looked over his shoulder, identifying her, before he moved out of the way. The other Order members saw her and repeated this example, all of them becoming quiet. Sophie stopped only when she reached the edge of the circle.
There was a body there. She couldn’t see the face as the tree above him was providing shade. Sophie inched forward, not going to believe unless she was one hundred and ten percent positive that it was him. She knelt by the body and studied the face of the man intently, running her fingers over his hands. He was cold. The moon appeared from behind a cloud and as it was at a different angle to the Dark Mark, was undeterred by the tree. Sophie’s heart stopped as the body was lit up. She collapsed down and sobbed loudly, burying her face in George’s shoulder.
“WHY?!” she screamed to the world, throwing her head back to look at the sky, hoping some answer would appear. Her voice failed her. “Why?” she whispered as she looked back down at her fiancé and her lover.
Then she saw something that broke her heart even further. There were blood marks under his robes, yet the material was fixed. Sophie prepared to rip it open.
“No!” Arthur shouted.
Sophie ignored him and ripped the robes down the middle. She read the message carved into George’s chest and sobbed further. It read: “Dear Sophie, I hope you like your wedding gift. ‘Love’ from Lord Voldemort.”
Sophie’s hand unconsciously moved to her stomach, where she knew that their baby was growing.

XXXXX 

Forty-three year old Sophie was jerked from the painful memories by a gentle knock on the door. She knew who it was. For twenty years, Dawn had always been the first one to come and check on her, to try and comfort her. Dawn would knock once and then knock again five minutes later, just to give Sophie another chance. She knew that Dawn wouldn’t feel offence if Sophie refused to answer like she did last year. Dawn was always caring for other people, wanting to help everyone in the world. It was one of the reasons why she loved her daughter, no matter who her father was.
“Come in,” Sophie called, barely loud enough to be heard. Dawn opened the door and knelt in front of her. Sophie saw that she was in her real form, ignoring the Metamorphosing powers that she had inherited from her mother. Sophie smiled weakly at her, examining her features. She had Sophie’s red hair, and brown eyes. But whereas Morzan’s eyes were dark brown and contained worlds of hate, Dawn’s eyes were light brown and shone with love. Not even the devastating war had dampened her personality, a fact that made Sophie very happy.

You like?

Well, thanks to my friends at the PPC, I finally worked out how to get a Live Journal account. Special thanks to Rohirric Monkey.

Now, I've created this for a number of reasons. One: so I can bitch and moan about things, and the world gets to know. Two: Some of you will be wondering if I'm ever going to update my fics.

Anyway, this first post is a cross between a rant and a test post to make sure I did everything right.

*taps microphone* Testing, testing. One, two, three...

Why must life suck? Sky One and Virgin Media (or whatever it's called) got into an argument, so Sky isn't available for me anymore. I was literally halfway through a program (that I was ENJOYING!) when it cut out and was replaced with the Hallmark Channel. And I wanted to finish watching Stargate SG-1 and Atlantis! Now I either have to wait for it to play on another channel, or find good quality pirates. Probably the latter as I'm not waiting for three years for it to be on TV. By that time, it'll already by on DVD, as will the movie.

My life sucks.

I'm feeling:  Ranty.